Diary of a St Ivean

The man who seriously overdoes the use of bath foam or shower gel, gets on the bus at the Malakoff and takes a seat right behind me. I am immediately enveloped in an heavy odour. Although it's a cold day, he's wearing the usual shorts although he's without his large floppy hat, exposing his bald head to the cold air. He carries a green Tesco Shopping Bag for Life. For some reason, he uses the Tesco store at Eastern Green in Penzance rather than the one at Carbis Bay. Perhaps only the Penzance store stocks his gel or foam.

As soon as he takes a seat he begins a conversation with a man further down the bus who claims to be an overworked builder: the subject is as usual the Rubrik Cube. From behind my head I hear energetic clicking as a cube is being twisted furiously. As he does this, he is telling the builder that he can complete the puzzle in just under two minutes but that the world record is 15 seconds. (Actually, it's 9.18 seconds). He also says that manipulating the cube is good exercise as he suffers from arthritis. Then he announces he's done and asks the builder to confirm that it was achieved under his two minute target and the builder readily agrees.

At Eastern Green he leaves the bus (the builder departed earlier), from the pavement waving to other passengers he has conversed with throughout the journey. All the way to the bus station, the odour of his bathing product permeates the vehicle.