Diary of a St Ivean

Yesterday the man who seriously overdoses on bathing products boarded the bus at the Malakoff on his way to the Penzance Tesco - but for the first time he was quite odourless. Perhaps his visit to Tesco is to replenish a depleted stock of his favourite odour?

Early indications suggest that the introduction of the national free bus travel pass for the over 60's may lead to riots at bus stations this summer as holidaymakers eschew tour operators and use the free buses for getting around. Sitting behind a couple of holidaymakers from the north of England the other day, I overheard them planning with military like precision how they intended exploring the entire county and beyond by bus during their stay in St Ives. A neighbour who was on her way to visit an elderly relative in hospital, forced her way to the front of a long queue of free bus pass users loudly declaring, "I live here and have important business - please let me through". And, taken by surprise and overawed by her fierceness, they did just that.